I like to see myself and my world as a place of awesomeness and when I feel icky, that is just not awesome. And, even though I do think it is important to capture my thoughts and what is going on, I'm not sure I need to share it with the world, you know? Some of it, but not all of it. And if I feel weird about what I am putting out there, then that is not true to who I want to be, you know?
What I can say, is that I am in such a funky place. What was familiar is not here and I am re-creating who I am, what I want, what I stand for. And, well, some days, the uncertainty gets to me and I start to question all of it, especially myself - who I am and what I am doing.
But, then the clouds clear and I am thinking straight again, not so fuzzy and unsure. Not so sad and overwhelmed by it all. And I can create again.
And, that feels good, because creating and being up to something in my life that inspires and excites me is who I am. It is what makes me tick. It's nice when the tick is strong and I feel like me. Not so nice when the goobers get me and all that is happening sucks the life out of me.
Ahhhh, life. Happening all around, the ups and downs, the good and the bad. All of it is here and I am doing my best to pay attention and take it all in.
Here are some pictures from this past weekend while we were out and about. I do love taking pictures of my children. They inspire me. They make me happy and fulfilled and even when they are acting crazy they remind me that I am alive and that all is as it should be.
This is not anyone I know, but I thought it was cool, what she was working on. We were at the clay fest in Manitou, which was really fun.
Ok, I am going to just focus on this kind of thing here right now. The good stuff. Maybe a peak or two at the other gunk if it doesn't feel like it will depress me me when I go back and re-read it later on.
